When I was a young mom, I spent a lot of time berating myself for things that weren’t going well during my day. I was frustrated with how messy my house was, my lack of energy, and my inability to stay calm. I wasted a lot of time feeling bad about myself. I was hesitant to burden Heavenly Father with my woes about the mess in my home, but when I did, it made all the difference. With God’s help, I made some changes that helped me feel better about my role as a mother. My prayers helped me not to be so hard on myself about everything that didn’t go well. And I felt like I could be the mom I had always wanted to be.
I set aside some time in the early morning to pray and think about the coming day. In one of my prayers, I felt inspired to only notice things I did well and focus on those things. After I prayed for Heavenly Father’s help to see things clearly, I listed the things that had gone well the day before. It was a simple list with simple things on it. My son stayed in his bed after our nightly routine. Nobody cried at the dinner table. I stayed calm and smiled even when my daughter reminded me she didn’t like peas at dinner time. I did this for one week and it amazed me the difference my prayers and quiet reflection made in my day. If I felt inadequate, I prayed for the feeling to go away, and then I would mentally list the things that were going well. I was eventually able to look at my day and fix things that were bothering me without berating myself.
I fine-tuned the dinner hour which used to be a problem spot in our day. And it has turned into a happy time that all of us looked forward to. It went from being a whining, crying mess to a time of family harmony. I realized that doing homework with the kids and trying to fix dinner was not a good combination. I adjusted the time I put dinner together and concentrated on my children. Silencing my phone and putting it away made an enormous difference. I taught my kids how to set the table and complimented their efforts instead of complaining that no one ever helped me with dinner.
At dinner time, we established a simple rule that we could only dislike one thing on the table. And we all had to keep it to ourselves and not complain. We practiced doing this with fake food and had a lot of fun and it amazed me how much better mealtime went. After dinner, everyone helped clean up, and then we played a game. We developed the rule everybody works so everybody can play. My husband and I both were quick to notice cooperation, smiles, and helpfulness. The change in our dinnertime was amazing! It has spread to other areas and I know the Lord helped me to not get overwhelmed and to concentrate on one problem area at a time. My prayers gave me the courage to change things. I love how I feel about my efforts with my family.
Sherene Van Dyke, Alamogordo, New Mexico, USA